Sending Your Child to College? 4 Legal Documents Parents Need
The Legal Documents Every Parent Needs Before Move-In Day
There is something uniquely chaotic about sending a child to college.
You spend weeks buying extra-long twin sheets, storage bins, shower shoes, a mattress topper that somehow costs more than your first mattress, and enough snacks to feed the entire dorm. You make lists. You check the lists. You make another list because the first list disappeared somewhere between Target and the dining room table.
Then move-in day arrives, you haul everything up three flights of stairs, try not to comment on the size of the dorm room, give one last hug, and drive home wondering how that tiny person you once buckled into a car seat is suddenly living somewhere without you.
But there is one thing that probably isn't on the college packing list. Legal documents. And if your child is 18 or older, those documents may be considerably more important than the mini-fridge.
The Birthday That Changes More Than You Think
When your child turns 18, something significant happens legally: your child becomes an adult. That sounds obvious. What isn't always obvious is what it means for parents.
For eighteen years, you have probably filled out medical forms, talked to doctors, scheduled appointments, dealt with insurance issues, handled school paperwork, and stepped in whenever your child needed help. Then your child turns 18.
You are still Mom or Dad. You may still be paying the tuition, carrying your child on your health insurance, paying the cell phone bill, and providing most of the financial support. But legally, your authority has changed.
North Carolina law allows an adult who is at least 18 and has the necessary capacity to execute a Health Care Power of Attorney naming someone to make health care decisions if the person becomes unable to make or communicate those decisions. In other words, once your child is an adult, your child gets to decide who will have that authority.
That distinction becomes especially important when your child is living two or three hours away at college—or perhaps several states away.
Hopefully, you will never need these documents. But if something happens, you will be very glad your family took care of them before you loaded the car for move-in day.
1. Health Care Power of Attorney
Let's start with the document I consider essential for a young adult: a Health Care Power of Attorney. A Health Care Power of Attorney allows your adult child to name someone, often a parent, to make health care decisions if your child becomes unable to make or communicate those decisions.
Under North Carolina law, the health care agent can be given broad authority to make the health care decisions the individual could otherwise make personally. The authority generally becomes effective when the required determination is made that the individual lacks sufficient capacity to make or communicate health care decisions.
Think about what that could mean for a college student. Your daughter is attending school in Charlotte and is seriously injured in a car accident. Your son is at college in Wilmington and becomes unconscious after a medical emergency. Your child is studying out of state and unexpectedly requires hospitalization.
Your first instinct as a parent is probably the same one you've had since the day that child was born:
I'm coming. What do you need me to do?
But being the parent of an adult doesn't automatically mean you are the person legally authorized to make that adult's health care decisions.
A properly executed Health Care Power of Attorney lets your child make that choice ahead of time. And that's an important point. This isn't about a parent trying to hold onto control over an adult child.
It's actually the opposite. Your child is exercising control by deciding whom they trust to speak for them if they cannot speak for themselves.
Happy Lawyer Tip
Have this conversation with your college student as an adult-to-adult conversation.
Instead of saying, “I need you to sign this so I can make your decisions,” try explaining, “Now that you're 18, the law treats you as an adult. You get to decide who you would want helping you if there were ever an emergency and you couldn't make decisions yourself.”
That's a very different conversation—and a much healthier introduction to estate planning.
2. HIPAA Authorization
Next is the document parents are often surprised to learn about: a HIPAA Authorization.
HIPAA is the federal law most people associate with medical privacy. Once your child is an adult, you should not assume that being the parent, or even carrying your child on your health insurance, automatically gives you unrestricted access to medical information.
A HIPAA Authorization allows your child to authorize health care providers to disclose protected medical information to the people your child chooses.
Why does that matter?
Imagine receiving a call that your 19-year-old has been taken to the emergency room. You call the hospital and say:
“I'm her mother. What's happening?”
You may expect the hospital to start explaining everything. It isn't always that simple.
There are circumstances under HIPAA in which health care providers may share information with family members, including situations involving the patient's care and certain emergencies. But parents should not build their family's emergency plan around hoping an exception applies or that a provider decides disclosure is appropriate.
A HIPAA Authorization can make your child's wishes much clearer. Your child can identify the people who are authorized to receive medical information, which can be especially helpful when a parent is trying to communicate with doctors from another city or state.
And here's another important distinction:
A HIPAA Authorization and a Health Care Power of Attorney do different jobs.
The HIPAA Authorization deals primarily with access to medical information. The Health Care Power of Attorney identifies who can make health care decisions when your child cannot. For many young adults, having both makes sense.
3. Durable Financial Power of Attorney
Medical emergencies aren't the only situations in which a college student may need help.
A Durable Financial Power of Attorney allows your child to appoint an agent to handle financial and legal matters within the authority granted by the document.
North Carolina's Uniform Power of Attorney Act provides that a power of attorney is durable unless the document expressly says that it terminates upon incapacity. North Carolina law also generally provides that a power of attorney is effective when executed unless the document specifies a later date or triggering event.
That means this is a document that needs to be drafted thoughtfully. Your child should understand what authority is being granted, to whom, and when that authority can be used.
For a college student, appropriate authority might help someone deal with matters such as banking, bills, insurance, leases, tax matters, or other financial affairs if the student cannot handle those matters personally.
Imagine your child spends a semester studying abroad and an important financial issue comes up at home. Or your child is hospitalized for several weeks and something needs to be handled with a landlord or financial institution. Or there is an accident and your child is temporarily unable to manage financial affairs.
A properly drafted financial Power of Attorney can give the person your child selected the legal authority needed to help.
Again, this doesn't mean your 18-year-old is handing Mom and Dad the keys to everything.
The document can be drafted based on your child's circumstances and comfort level. The important thing is that your child has made the decision before there is an emergency.
4. FERPA Authorization
Here's one that surprises parents who are paying thousands of dollars in college tuition. Paying the tuition does not necessarily mean you automatically have access to your student's education records.
The Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act—usually called FERPA—is a federal law protecting student education records.
When a student turns 18 or attends a postsecondary institution at any age, FERPA rights transfer from the parent to the student. Yes, you read that correctly.
You could be paying the tuition bill, room and board, meal plan, car insurance, health insurance, and the monthly credit card bill. Your college student still has privacy rights concerning education records.
There are exceptions. For example, federal law permits colleges to disclose education records to parents in certain circumstances, including when the student is a dependent for federal income tax purposes. There are also provisions concerning health or safety emergencies and certain alcohol or controlled-substance violations involving students under 21.
But again, I wouldn't make “hopefully an exception applies” the family plan.
Colleges often have their own FERPA authorization or release process that allows students to designate people who may receive certain educational information.
Before move-in day, have your student check the school's requirements. And while you're at it, have an important family conversation: What information do we actually need access to?
Your college student's growing independence is a good thing. The goal isn't to monitor every grade or email a professor because your child got a C on a chemistry exam.
The goal is to understand what happens if a genuine problem arises and your student wants you involved.
“But My Child Doesn't Own Anything. Why Do They Need Estate Planning?”
I hear some version of this question frequently when people think about estate planning for young adults. And I understand why.
Your 18-year-old probably doesn't have a house, retirement accounts, investment properties, or the sort of assets people typically associate with an estate plan. They may have $147 in their checking account and a laptop held together by stickers.
But estate planning isn't only about deciding who inherits property. It's also about answering a much more immediate question:
Who can help me if I'm alive but unable to handle something myself?
For most young adults heading to college, that's the bigger issue.
A Health Care Power of Attorney addresses medical decision-making.
A HIPAA Authorization addresses access to health information.
A Durable Financial Power of Attorney addresses financial and legal affairs.
A FERPA authorization can address access to education records.
None of those require your child to be wealthy. They require your child to be an adult.
“Can't I Just Deal With This If Something Happens?”
Maybe. But that's exactly when you don't want to be figuring it out.
Imagine learning that your child has been seriously injured at 11:00 at night. You're trying to find out which hospital your child is in, arrange transportation, contact other family members, and understand what the doctors are saying. That's not when you want to discover there is a question about who has authority to act.
Planning ahead isn't about expecting something terrible to happen.
We buy insurance without expecting our houses to burn down.
We wear seat belts without expecting to get into an accident.
We put emergency contacts in our phones without expecting anyone to call them.
Legal planning works much the same way. You put the documents in place, hope they spend the next four years collecting dust, and know they're there if your family ever needs them.
What If My Child Goes to College Outside North Carolina?
This is another important consideration.
If your child is a North Carolina resident attending college elsewhere, talk with your estate planning attorney about whether the documents you prepare here are appropriate for your child's circumstances and whether anything additional should be considered in the state where your child will be living.
North Carolina law addresses recognition of certain documents executed in other jurisdictions, but states can have different execution requirements and health care laws.
If your child is going to school far from home, this is worth discussing rather than assuming one approach fits every situation.
Your student should also know where copies of the documents are located. A beautifully drafted Health Care Power of Attorney sitting in a locked filing cabinet in Garner isn't particularly helpful when your child is in an emergency room hundreds of miles away and no one can find it.
Keep copies somewhere secure but accessible, and make sure the people your child has named know that the documents exist.
Add Legal Documents to the College Packing List
College is one of those strange milestones where parenting changes almost overnight. You go from reminding your child to bring a jacket to watching that child make increasingly adult decisions about education, money, health care, relationships, and the future.
Part of preparing them for that independence is making sure they understand the legal rights and responsibilities that come with adulthood.
So yes, buy the extra-long twin sheets. Get the shower caddy. Pack the phone charger—and perhaps a backup phone charger because we all know how that's going to go. Make sure they know how to do laundry.
And somewhere on that enormous college checklist, add:
Health Care Power of Attorney
HIPAA Authorization
Durable Financial Power of Attorney
FERPA Authorization or the college's applicable release process
It may not be the most exciting part of getting ready for college. But it might be one of the most important.
One Last Thought From The Happy Lawyer
Sending a child to college is supposed to be about giving them wings, not finding new ways to control them. That's why I like to frame these documents differently when I'm talking with young adults.
You're not signing documents that give your parents control over your life. You're signing documents that let YOU decide who you trust to help you when you need it.
That's what good estate planning does at every age.
It puts you in control while you can make the decisions, instead of leaving everyone to figure things out during a crisis.
If you have a child who recently turned 18 or is heading off to college, now is a good time to talk about putting these basic legal documents in place. At Mackintosh Law, PLLC, we help North Carolina families prepare for life's transitions—including the exciting ones.
Because sometimes peace of mind fits right between the mini-fridge and the extra-long twin sheets.
Have a College-Bound Child? Let’s Get the Legal Stuff Checked Off the List.
If your child is 18 or older and heading to college, now is a great time to make sure the right legal documents are in place.
At The Happy Lawyer NC, we help North Carolina families prepare for life’s transitions—including the exciting ones. We can help your young adult understand and put the appropriate legal documents in place so that, if something unexpected happens, the people they trust are able to help.
Schedule a FREE 15-minute Discovery Call with our office to learn more about getting your college student’s legal documents completed before move-in day. Call us at (919) 336-4219 schedule below:
You’ve packed the dorm room. Now let’s make sure you’ve taken care of the person living in it.
