I wish I could tell you that estate administration problems usually begin with complicated legal issues. They don’t.

Very often, they begin with something much more ordinary. One sibling has been named executor. Another sibling wants to know what is happening with Mom’s house. Someone else wants Grandma’s china. Nobody knows how much money is in the estate. Weeks go by without an update.

Then somebody sends an angry text. Someone else calls a lawyer. And before long, a family that managed to get along reasonably well for decades is fighting over an estate.

I call these executor horror stories, but most of them don’t begin with a bad person or even a bad executor. They begin with misunderstandings about what an executor is supposed to do, poor communication, unrealistic expectations, or decisions made too quickly.

Losing someone you love is one of life's most difficult experiences. Along with the grief comes a long list of questions that most people have never had to answer before.

"What am I supposed to do now?"

It's one of the first questions I hear when someone calls my office after the death of a spouse, parent, or other loved one.

Sometimes the caller is exhausted after months of caregiving. Sometimes the loss was sudden and unexpected. No matter the circumstances, almost everyone feels overwhelmed by the responsibilities that suddenly land on their shoulders.